Someone actually liked the latest post I put on here so I went to see when it was. The end of 2024!!! I missed an entire year of “blogging”. Wow!! 2025 flew by but you know what, nothing changed. My thoughts, attitude and weight all stayed the same.
I didn’t get to go on my cruise last June because I didn’t lose any weight. Purchasing two airline tickets not to mention the moving around issues I have would have been a waste of time and money for me. It wasn’t worth it. So I lost the $250.00 deposit I put down.
My heaviest weight was 472!!!! Yes, you read that number right. I still can’t believe that I hit that weight. I am currently at 454.4 lbs as of 1/10/26. That is still extremely too high. I have more trouble with my lower back aching and my body just hurts a lot.
But for some reason, God is still allowing me to have good internal numbers. I went to a place on Saturday for lunch that was about 45 minutes away. As I was driving back I cried the entire time. Talking to God and telling Him I wanted to live, not just exist until I’m called home to Heaven. I want to have a purpose, I want to have a reason to get healthy, to come home to a clean apartment, to be excited about the day ahead of me. Over the years I have still struggled with my “why”. I have mentioned this several times. I still don’t know what it is. I know that God has me here for a reason. I know that my internal health is still great for a reason. I just don’t know why?
I just wrote a paragraph that I decided to delete. It was about the way I see myself and it wasn’t pretty. So, I’m going to leave this here. I don’t know how to find my purpose. I don’t know how to find my “why”. I don’t know how to start to live and not just exist. If you all would pray for clarity I sure would appreciate it.
God is great and I know He wants me to bring glory to him so I will give it a try, one hour or minute at a time.
Weight Goes Bye 